If you live with social anxiety disorder (SAD), you might be unknowingly projecting a number of different nonverbal cues of anxiety. Some of your behaviors might also turn other people off. Though you might feel awkward at first, learning different cues can help you practice becoming more confident and approachable. Social anxiety can also make it harder to read the body language of others. Learning to interpret the signals people are sending can make you more confident and comfortable in social situations. If you are looking to improve your body language and your ability to read that of others, the following tips can help. In each section, you’ll also find links to more advice to boost your body language skills. If you want to change things up and start creating a more inviting aura, start by practicing some more approachable body language. Some strategies that can help include:
Avoiding fidgeting or other nervous habitsKeeping your head upMaking eye contactNodding as you listen to others speakSmiling
Although these behaviors might feel natural due to your anxiety, the message that they send to others is that you are not an easy person to get to know. If you want to change your social success, start by looking to see if you are making these body language mistakes. A few body language behaviors that can send negative signals include:
Awkward or fake smilesCrossing your armsFidgetingLack of eye contactLooking downMoving away from peopleSlouching
Some actions that can help you have greater confidence or appear more confident include:
Having a firm handshakeStanding tallWalking with broad strides
Using body language that conveys greater confidence can even help make you feel more confident. People with social anxiety disorder often have trouble with things like eye contact, which can make it more difficult to notice the facial signals that other people send. Some facial movements that can convey emotion include:
Covering the mouth with the handsLowered eyebrowsPursed lipsRaised eyebrows
If you are interested in becoming better at reading facial expressions, first learn these basic emotions and then look to see indicators of each during a conversation. If you’ve ever suspected that someone isn’t being honest with you, it can be helpful to look at both their spoken words and their body language. Some signs that someone might not be truthful include:
Engaging in grooming behaviors such as playing with their hairHolding their body stifflyNot making eye contact
Of course, none of these actions alone means that a person is necessarily lying. When you are interpreting body language, it is often helpful to look for signals as a whole. Look to see which of these manners your conversation partner is exhibiting and think about what that means for what is being said. If there is a disconnect between words and body language, body language may sometimes be a more reliable indicator. Some things that you can do to help improve your understanding of nonverbal language include:
Asking questions about what people meanLooking for nonverbal signals that don’t match up to spoken wordsNoticing tone of voicePaying attention to the context and situationWatching how body language is used to emphasize your words
As with anything, exposure to what you fear will reduce your anxiety. Once your anxiety is lowered, it will become easier to read others’ body language and make sure that your own nonverbal behavior is aligned with the message that you truly want to send.
